Okay, maybe a little pissed. I am on a posting hiatus on facebook, mostly because I'm having a hard time figuring out how we move past where we're at and I feel like I'm just too deep in my own head to not take things so personally when people respond to what I post.
I have a hard time understanding how those in power, Christians, the rich, the straight feel so picked on these days, when in recent US history have the seats of power not been held by straight, white, rich, christian men? And, when did Christianity become about vilifying poor people? If, a nation, a people, whatever, are willing to hold so tightly to their interpretation of THE CONSTITUTION, why isn't there the same willingness to really follow the teaching of the Christ so many of these same people believe in? When did religion become more of a reflection of politics than anything else?
I understand that belief systems are deeply held and very personal so forgive me for sharing mine, here, assuming anyone will read this- and apologies to those of you who may be hurt or offended by this.
When I left the LDS church it was largely because I had a crisis of faith, I couldn't hold to the faith that if I was a good girl here in this earthly realm that I would be rewarded with children and an eternal partner on the other side, IF I was good, and faithful enough here. I wasn't willing to wait and made a very deliberate decision to live my life another way. I also left because I could not reconcile my personal political beliefs with the tenets in my faith in regard to women, race and sexual orientation. My faith wasn't strong enough to carry me through the doubts, the anger and the disappointment I felt in an organization that I spent 18 months proselytizing for. Over the years what I've learned is that I have to live my life as close to the truths I hold as possible. I know that what I believe is just that, what I believe. The personal irony for me is that what I do and the way I choose to live my life is deeply based in faith. I can't really even explain exactly what I mean by that. But what I believe to my core is that people have a right to basic needs, food, shelter, health care, and that there will always be people who will exploit opportunities. What I don't understand is why some people think it's okay for the well heeled and those who have had every opportunity to exploit people and systems to get ahead but resent every penny used to help people have even a pittance of an existence, deserving or "otherwise".
I'm tired of the notion that if you are poor it is somehow your own fault and that if you are rich you got there through hard work, damn the destruction in your wake.
I am having another crisis of faith, faith in the goodness of my neighbors, faith in my belief that we can find common ground and figure out how to solve problems.
Don't try and make sense of it, just refer to the title of this post.
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